Trevonics before the Storm

By Trev Alberts
formerly of ESPN.com

I've started to actually look at this bowl schedule dealie here and there are way more bowl games than I thought! There's got to be over twenty in the next 3 days! Good thing the office is back in the swing of things, because I don't think the spellcheker could take anymore pure, unadulterated Trev. My freestyle prognosticating is so cutting edge, no amount of squiggles can contain it. Unleash the scoreboard!

Bowl Season to Date:
Straight Up: 7-2
Against the Spread: 7-2

That is one awfully seductive record, I sure hope I can sustain my analytical prowess all through the exhibitional weekend. On to the Thursday/Friday games, but first:

Florida State 44-UCLA 27
Do you see what happens, Karl? This is what happens when you travel with the juggler, Karl. In an unexpected shootout, the Bruins kept keeping the play calls close to the vest and couldn't keep up with Seminoles relentless pace. Throw in a couple of defense/ST scores, and Florida State throughly embarrassed newly-minted defensive wunder-coordinator, DeWayne Walker. I would be very interested to see how complete this beating would have been had Florida State actually had a quarterback. Drew Weatherford, you are still teh suxxor, in the internet parlance, and I mean that from the heart.

Independence Bowl, Shreveport LA
Oklahoma St. (-2) vs. Alabama (430 12/28 ESPN)
One would think I would be a bit biased against the Cowboys for defeating my beloved 'Huskers. Normally, that would be correct, but considering that that win is the only glowing bulletpoint on either team's resumes, it is the tie-breaker in this otherwise mediocre bowl game between power-conference also-rans. OKState's signature win is Nebraska while Alabama's is...The Orgeron? Who's even coaching the Tide? I don't know! I don't even think they know! That whole coaching search is pissing me off, just because it is so darn quiet! You can't take this long and not have any kind of inkling where this is going. Hopefully, the game will provide enough highlights to fill the evening's currently empty halftime shows.
Trev's pick: Oklahoma State

Holiday Bowl, San Diego CA
California (-3) vs. Texas A&M (800 12/28 ESPN)
Cal is the new Oregon, and the new Oregon loves playing these games with a chip. Coach Fran's gimmick's will only get him so far as Tedford has had weeks to out gimmick him. I don't know what kind of crazy grab-bag offense will be in play for this plus-sized Poinsettia Bowl, but it's definitely won the battle for main game in the media room tonight.
Trev's pick: California

Texas Bowl, Houston TX
Rutgers (-7.5) vs. Kansas State (800 12/28 NFL)
Considering this game is on the NFL Network and a possible snuff film, it will be relegated to "we kind of have an eye on it" at the compound. Coincidentally, this is how we watched the Kansas State-Texas game. I don't think any part of the crowd will be doing the Wildcats any favors in Houston. The entire state of New Jersey is probably at this game, plus the locals are probably all 'Horns/Rice/SMU fans. The Ray Rice for 2007 Heisman campaign starts tonight, regardless of his stats, because there will be nothing better to talk about. It will be down to that or "Hey, remember when they were undefeated?" by halftime.
Trev's pick: Rutgers

Music City Bowl, Nashville TN
Clemson (-9) vs. Kentucky (100 12/29 ESPN)
We get five whole games on Friday, but we might as well just not count this one. A Tiger bloodbath all the way. Sure, there is the worry that Clemson may play down, but who wants to be the team that loses to Kentucky? Kentucky's just happy to be there, look out.
Trev's pick: Clemson

Sun Bowl, El Paso TX
Missouri (+3.5) vs. Oregon State (200 12/29 CBS)
The beauty, the pageantry, the Beavers! the Tigers! It's the Sun Bowl on CBS! The reward for slogging through the Music City Bowl is this likely competitive matchup between Mizzou and OSU. Following the playing down theory, I don't think the Beavs have much to prove here while Missouri is likely to go all Boise State on them. Call it a hunch, call it analysis, hell, I just don't like the matchup.
Trev's pick: Missouri

Liberty Bowl, Memphis TN
South Carolina (-5.5) vs. Houston (430 12/29 ESPN)
HA ha! Really? REALLY?!?! No way! Super Chicken for the win. You can't be serious...Now we see the violence inherent in the system.
Trev's pick: South Carolina

Insight Bowl, Tempe AZ
Texas Tech (-6.5) vs. Minnesota (730 12/29 NFL)
It's a shame this game is on the NFL Network. Everyone should be able to see the yarr-riffic Tech offense rape and pillage some unsuspecting Gophers. I'm fairly certain that no one in the Big Ten chucks it with such regularity, save Purdue, and the Boilers took it to Minnesota. Well then, there it is.
Trev's pick: Texas Tech

Champs Sports Bowl, Orlando FL
Purdue (-1) vs. Maryland (800 12/29 ESPN)
Going back to the basics, clearly Purdue is the favorite considering the sweet, sweet mustaches of the coaching staff. Combine this with Maryland looking unimpressive in an equally unimpressive ACC season, and the edge goes to the Boilermakers. On a more analytical point, in the battle of two horrible defenses, Purdue's sucks least. They could put that on T-shirts: "Purdue: We suck least!"
Trev's pick: Purdue

Trev Alberts is a correspondent on CSTV. He's why they don't have a bowl contract.