Curses!

By Broderick West Quinnsington IV
Local Ne'er Do Well

To the untrained eye, it may seem that my glorious Wheel of Death is faltering down the stretch. The flaming debris currently spinning off of it uncontrollably has only made it more efficient in its diabolicalness! Now the targets are fewer, but the result will still be the same. All will tremble at the might of the lean mean Wheel of Death as it caroms uncontrollably toward the BCS fortunes, allowing for I, Broderick West Quinnsington IV, to take the spoils for myself!

BEHOLD THE WHEEL OF DEATH!!!!!!!

Now, tremble, football ignorami, as I unveil my latest modifications to my doomsday device....blasted Iowa......BEHOLD! The latest nefarious cog in my slightly unstoppable machinations, THE ARKANSAS RAZORBACKS!

A deadly whirling dervish of incalculable horror!

Yes...go 'Hogs! For you see, when the newest addition to my football automaton runs the proverbial table, the title pool will be sufficiently sullied! BWAH-HAHAHAHA! NYAH-HAHAHAHAHA! No precious computer system can save you from this quandary...
Who will claim the last title spot?

It could be any one of these:

• a 1-loss Auburn team shut-out of it's own title game
• the undefeated WVU/Louisville champeen
• defending 1-loss Texas
• a plucky California team, once-hobbled by mighty Tennessee
• or even the LOSER of Michigan/Ohio State!

Who has claim? ALL HAVE CLAIM! Don't you see? It will be a complete argle-bargle of unforeseen magnitude, and that's not even considering the trifling nits expounded by Boise State, Rutgers, and Arkansas itself! The circular logic of it all sucks the system down the drain, and I will rise above the tide advertising simoleons in hand!

It's all coming together now....

Broderick West Quinnsington IV is a dastardly scoundrel. He once bit his thumb at Otto von Bismarck.